I know I said I didn't want to hear certain typical words of comfort, but I should clarify that doesn't mean we don't want to hear anything. Although people's comments won't take away the pain, we do find some comfort in seeing them and knowing that we're not walking through this ordeal alone.(So go ahead and comment. Even if you've been checking the blog but have never met our family, just knowing that others care helps.)
I've heard that one of the general differences between men and women is that when there's a problem, men want to fix it and women just want to vent and be heard. I'm every bit that cliche woman right now. I know we'll get through this, but right now I'm not looking for solutions (there really is no fixing it, after all) -- just empathy.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
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Mindi and Chris,
ReplyDeleteYour family is on our minds and in our prayers many times each day. Your Uncle Skip broke down as he tried again to pray for you last night. He squeezed my hand, which is his way of telling me to finish for him. We love you and weep with you at this time.
Love,
Uncle Skip and Aunt Barb
I appreciate the clarification since words seem so inadequate at a time like this anyway. As a guy I can tell you we want to "fix it" and times like this remind us when it's time to 'Let Go and Let God' as I see no other way.
ReplyDeleteAny of us with kids especially feel the loss you must feel at this time. I can tell you from experience, as bad as it seems right now, the raw ache will fade and time does heal.
Wanting you to know you're not alone.
Love,
Aunt Ceil and Uncle Lance
Mindi, it was so heart wrenching to read your post the other day. I felt so much for you yet understood how you and Chris may have needed to come to terms with this in a private way. I am never good at these things, because sometimes there are simply no words you think will provide comfort. Just know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers, as they are for many people.
ReplyDeleteBryan S.
As I cried and prayed for you this morning, two things in particular kept coming to my mind. When we lost our first baby weeks before she was due, I asked God "why". I never did get an answer - but was shown the verses Matthew 27:46 where Jesus himself asked God "why" as He hung on the cross. Some things we will never have an answer for until we meet Jesus face to face.
ReplyDeleteThen God gave me this Word for you - "I have called you by your name, and you are Mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you, and through the rivers, they will not overwhelm you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned. You are precious in My sight and I love you. Fear not, for I am with you." I believe God feels what you feel, and cries with you too.
I pray that you will receive the peace of John 14:27 where Jesus said,"Peace I leave with you; My own peace I now give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid."
When we were in the "quiet room" and the doctors told us that Garrett would probably survive maybe another 24 hours before his little heart gave out - I felt a strong urge to lay hands on Garrett and pray for him. As I placed my hand over his tiny chest, I prayed that if God was not going to heal him, that He would take him home now - and stop his suffering. Then, as you held him in your arms we watched his little heart stop beating. And though I miss him terribly, and can't stop crying, I see Jesus taking Garrett in His arms and holding him and blessing him, just as He did in Mark 10:16.
No one can take away your pain, just know that my heart is broken with yours.
Love you,
Mom
Mindi and Chris -
ReplyDeleteWe heard the news about Garrett...he fought hard from what we heard and read, and even so it apparently was just too much for him. I do believe there is a great consolation in the fact that he is now free from pain in his loving heavenly Fathers arms. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
David, Tamara, Jesse, Kaylee
Hey Dede,
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking and praying for you guys and hoping the best for Garret. Its tough to think that I never got to meet the lil' guy. When Dad called us up the other night to tell us about Garrets passing it just didn't feel right. All of us up here are praying for you, and wishing you the best. I hope that I can see you soon because I need to give you a big hug.
Love you Dede,
your little brother,
Sam
Dear Chris and Mindi,
ReplyDeleteMy heart goes out to you and your mom. I feel at a loss, I'm here and your there. I want to comfort, to lend a shoulder to cry on, to pat your back and say it will be okay. I know Garret is well look after because he has your sister to comfort him. Your mom, your mom loves you so much, she wants to ease your pain, it breaks her heart to have you go through this. I'm here offering love and support and will do what ever I can for you.
Always,
Curt
Dear Chris and Mindi..I feel like my heart is broken..I wish there was something I could say or do to make things better.You are so precious to me and I hate to have you going through this heartache. One of my friends' son gave his son a dirt bike for his fifteenth birthday. He had all of the necessary gear to protect him, but the first day he went out he had an accident and fell and broke his neck. His mind is fine, but he will be a paraplegic for the rest of his life. He is depressed, because all of his friends are getting their licenses, and he needs help to just get into a chair. When your Grandpa Jack died, I know he went right to Heaven, and it gave me such peace when he told us all about it. He was
ReplyDeletejust excited when he talked about how beautiful it was. He mentioned that the streets were of gold, and I couldn't imagine it, but later I read in the bible that the streets are of gold. I'll bet Jack will look after his little guy. I have prayed for you so much, and will keep you in my prayers to help you through this. Your wonderful blogs have made me feel so close to Garrett..I don't know how this could happen, but I know that I love you so much, and you are in my thoughts day and night..
Love you, and God Bless...Gramma June
Mindi and Chris,
ReplyDeleteWhat an emotional roller-coaster. I've read the emails, the blog postings, watched the videos and smiled at the photographs you've captured of little Garrett. As I sit here reading your final post and the comments our awesome family has left, tears well up yet again. You are such a strong woman, Mindi, you always have been, always will be. Along with the rest of the Hill clan, I'm praying for comfort to surround you guys. You all are loved immensely, even though distance separates us. This experience has had a profound impact on me, and I wish you all peace.
I love you!
Cousin Emily
Mindi, Chris, and Jonathan,
ReplyDeleteOur tears are falling and our hearts are breaking for you. Thank you for sharing pictures, videos, and stories of your precious little son with us. We are praying for you.
Terry, Lara, Evan, & Ivy Smoley
Mindi, Chris, Jonathan, and Family,
ReplyDeleteBarbara and I just want you to know that our hearts and minds are with you. We know we can't take away the grieving and the pain, but want you to know that you and yours are in our prayers.
Amos
Mindi, Chris and Jonathan - We are so very sorry for your loss. You are all in our thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteLeslie, Dean, Molly and Brooke Riess
Mindi, We are very sorry for your huge loss. You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. - Maqbool
ReplyDeleteMindi,
ReplyDeleteI am so very sorry for your huge loss. I know words cannot express your pain and grief. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Amy Davis
Mindi, I wish I could say something comforting, but I don't know if that's even possible. Please know that I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, and you and your family are, and will continue to be, in my prayers. - Elizabeth Rice
ReplyDeleteMindi, I am so very sad about the loss of Garrett. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers at this most difficult of times. God Bless you, Chris and Jonathan. - Nora O'Sullivan
ReplyDeleteMindi -
ReplyDeleteI wish that I could come up with words of solace for you and your family, but I know that nothing I say will be adequate.
When I was growing up, a new family joined the church I attended. When asked the number of children the couple had, they talked about their four children, one up in heaven and three on earth. I always found their statement to be a powerful and beautiful way to remember their son Timothy. (Over 15 years later and I still remember their son's name, even though I never met him.)
You are, and always will be, the mother of two beautiful boys. One is up in heaven and one is here on earth, but both are absolutely precious and special. Thank you for writing about little Garrett. I am so sorry.
Robyn Z.
OH Mindi... I'm so sorry. My heart breaks for you and Chris and Jonathon to know that his brother will only be able to play with him in his dreams. I want you to know I'm thinking about you and sending you support.
ReplyDeleteBeth Ayen
Mindi, your ability and willingness to blog your thoughts at a time like this simply blow my mind. I obviously can't say to what extent it is therapeutic for you, but know that you've done the rest of us a great service by showing us just how pathetic our day to day concerns can really be. Here I am, the father of two happy, healthy little girls - lamenting my terrible misfortune at having a sore back that is slowing me down for a couple of days. Thanks for the wake up call. I know your strength at a time like this is making your little boy proud.
ReplyDeleteThere's a sad poem that has been a strange comfort to me in times of grief - google it if and when you're ready for it - "Break, break, break" by Tennyson.
God Bless,
Al Spohn
Mindi,
ReplyDeleteI am saddened to hear of your loss. As you wisely noted, words can't heal your pain or change the outcome. But if you gain any comfort in knowing others are thinking of you and praying for you, know that you and your family are in my thoughts and will be in the days and weeks to come.
Thinking of you.
Shawna O'Reilly
Oh, Mindi. I am just heartbroken for you. I have been quietly following Garrett's journey online and though we don't know each other well, know that you have been in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteI worked for the March of Dimes for a few years. They offer a number of resources for parents who are going through an infant loss. You can find them here: http://www.marchofdimes.com/pnhec/572.asp. When the time feels right, some of these things may be helpful to you, and to your family and friends who are searching for ways to offer comfort. You can request a free bereavement kit through the Web site as well.
I hope this is helpful to you and your family. But if not, please put it aside and grieve in your own way.
Annie
I like what you said a lot, and I am happy for your sincere words; and you are very much not alone. I am grateful that I was told about your son and your family, and have been praying for you. I do not know what it is like, but I know the Blessed Mother does. I pray she makes her presence known to you as a comforter.
ReplyDeleteDear Mindi and Chris,
ReplyDeleteWe are so sorry to hear about Garrett. Although we never met him in person, I feel like we got a glimpse of his unique, powerful personality and spirit through your postings. We so appreciate you taking the time to post about Garrett so those of us miles away could get to know him and be truly touched by him. We can't begin to imagine what you are going through, but please know we are thinking and praying for you during this time.
Love,
Nathan and Mary Bedosky (Moe)
Mindi, I am so sad to hear of your family's loss. My thoughts are with you all during this difficult time. - Becky Hynes
ReplyDeleteMindi and Chris,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss and I realize that words will not due you justice in this time of grief so I offer you love and support and prayer. I have been following along and so grateful to have gotten to see your little one, as short as his stay with us on Earth was, he was truly beautiful. I love you guys and send you peaceful wishes of love and comfort in these days to come and our family struggles to understand why God had to take one of his little angels so soon.
May peace and love be with you,
Your cousin Heather @~~~>~~~
Just wanted you guys to know that we love you and are always just a phone call away. Thank you for sharing your beautiful little man with us through your posts and pictures and videos. We all miss him too. Love, Christa, Aaron and Jacob.
ReplyDeleteMindi, I been thinking of you and your family ever since Lisa sent the e-mail to our division. I can't tell you how heartbroken I am ... all of us, I'm sure. For anyone who has loved a child, it hurts us, too. You are not alone in your sorrow. Will be keeping you and your family in my prayers ... I mean that literally. Love, Sara Lee
ReplyDeleteMindi, Chris and Family...I have never met you but have been reading your story and just wanted to extend my sympathies for your loss. Your son was beautiful. I watched your videos of your little angel-it made me cry. I cannot imagine what you and your family are going through right now. I have two children of my own and am reminded how each day with them is a blessing. It looks like your 30 days with Garrett will remain a wonderful memory for you! Please know you are in our thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteThank you all for sharing your story....what a beautiful gift you received in this precious little life. We will pray for you and all those who know and love you as we wait in joyful hope for the day when you meet Garrett in eternal life....
ReplyDeleteMargaret, a friend of Lisa's